Tag Archives: sister

A Spiritual Journey | September 6, 2015

Tuscan Countryside, Italy

Finding Jocelyn Turner…

This morning as I prepare to  meditate my thoughts return to Jocelyn Turner – and the potential connection. A connection for her…. with her mom.

But… I do not  know Jocelyn Turner. And I did not know Jocelyn Turner’s mother. But I do connect with this story. The minute I discovered it I knew, in my heart… and because a chill went through me as goosebumps permeated my skin  [and maybe I should start referring to these goosebumps as ‘angelbumps‘ – since they are happening quite frequently ☺].

Anyway – the story connects with many things I have tuned-in to during meditation. Some things familiar….about many children,  mommy leaving, mommy’s your daddy And the circumstances of mom’s passing. message is there….to Jocelyn from her mom. This I KNOW.  And I will need to trust I will be guided on what to do.

Today’s Meditation Notes 


‘she almost did’ – ‘lose a child’
• ‘it’s all about trust’
9/6..something about today’s date…[maybe ’96?]
J-name (like JoAnne)
• Feeling of falling forward – face first
‘better finish the bottle’
• (numbers) 10, 52
•something about ‘all the way’
Arletha ♫Ar-lee-tha♪   (Spirit Guide – helping me ♥)…the children
‘looking up’
• ‘detox’

Still working through the SYMBOLISM

A Little about My Spirit Guide Arletha…

I was introduced to Arletha (Letha) in September of 2014. She is my African-American Spirit Guide. In December 2014 she began popping in on my meditation practice frequently…and I was able to learn more about her.  Arletha helps me focus on my breathing during meditation. She typically stays in the shadows and has a connection with ‘the cats’. She also has a connection to ‘the children’…AND  has been helping me with the Jocelyn Turner connection .

Reference Dates: Sept 3, 2014; Dec 5, 2014; Dec 9, 2014; Dec 13, 2014; Dec 24, 2014; Feb 4,2015;

A Spiritual Journey | September 2, 2015

WEDNESDAY | 11:15 am

Book of Lessons

stockvault-open-book144296Today is day #3 of reviewing my journal and updating the Book of Lessons. And I’m finding the lessons… and the guidance. And the messages and the connections. Trying NOT to let it overwhelm me, though. Trying to stay grounded and balanced. And to Trust.

One day at a time. No need to feel lost.

Now I meditate before I move back to my ‘To Do’ list. Meditate for ME . Not sure if I will write today…but know I should affirm my intention at the start.

Immediately I get a song lyric… ♫after the boys of summer have gone♪. So,  I think today I’ll be writing.

Meditation Notes

11:25 am – 12:02 PM

• Mild headache…then heady feeling…then ache across the chest
♫another one bites the dust♫
R-M name
• Right foot feels distended
♫another one bites the dust♫
‘it’s not uncommon’
‘missing a step’ > like a ‘program’ 6-steps, 12-steps
• Lampshade…..SYMBOL…like covering/protecting the ‘light’
• Feeling happy
• Itch – shoulder then to neck then to top of head….like father/son/holy ghost
• ‘Catholic’
• Left hand and arm aches
♫gonna let it rain♪ then ♪ shine a light right on me♪
• Attention to left side of neck & throat
♫another one bites the dust♫
‘connecting energy through consciousness’
SHINE…just the music ♫
• Pain – lower left abdomen then around to lower back
• Feels like I’m going to sneeze! (didn’t)
• Front of face pressure – like skin is lifting/pulling from face
• Asking for the pain and discomfort to RELEASE/go away… ‘I want it to’ (BIG inhale)…then ‘Focus on what you want – not on what you don’t want’   {Thank You!}
• Teach. Heal.
• ‘Spirituality’
• Suddenly lots of weird words and visions…time to END

END…Not sure what happened at the end – maybe I lost focus? But the words and visions did not make me feel comfortable, so decided it was time to be done.




Social networks defined by social circles
Social networks defined by social circles

Today I met with Julie and Stephanie (and her daughter). My sister was here, too  (for moral support – of each of us, I think!)  We sat on the back deck and went through my journal notes. We made connections on some  things , but I know there is much more for them.  Did I ask enough questions? Did I LISTEN?

I keep reminding myself I don’t need to understand these message(s) – but it sure feels like it would help! ♥ These are not my messages – but theirs. The one thing I am sure of is this – only messages of healing, love, comfort and support  (and I’d like to add ‘hope‘ to this) for all concerned.

Well, my friends – I hope we  connect again….  ♥♥♥

Spiritual Journal August 13, 2015

Thursday: Time to Heal


10:25 AM: Spent a couple of hours yesterday with my niece – who is in the hospital.  I wish I could heal her – but I know that I can’t. I  can only reflect on all I have learned so far on my journey – and trust in the power of prayer.

Meditation Notes:

  • M-name [like Mike]
  • Feeling of ‘guilt’
  • Getting song lyrics ♫…and the tune – words are wrong – can’t remember name of artist
  • ‘sisters’
  • Attention to throat – down low
  • S-name [Stephanie]
  • Feeling ofsearching’…like mind is searching
  • Same song lyrics ♫…Heart (the artist!)
  • Heard “did you even know?”
  • ‘I can look at a person and just KNOW’
  • Sick feeling – like a gut feeling


♫♪ About the song lyrics ♪♫

Today’s song lyric  was from the song Alone, by Heart.

Spiritual Journal August 10, 2015

MONDAY: Nursery Rhymes

This morning my head fills with song lyrics…many songs, and even a nursery rhyme. This Old Man”This old man, he played one, He played knick-knack on my thumb; With a knick-knack paddywhack, Give the dog a bone…”  Strange I’d get this …maybe I’m just practicing (to be a nana ☺).  Sitting down to write has helped to turn the songs and rhymes off in my head, but they have been replaced by that airplane pressure sensation. As I acknowledge this feeling, the feeling of hunger fills me. I am hungry – it’s almost 11:00 AM and I haven’t eaten yet, but I’m going to meditate now anyway. While the house is still quiet.

Meditation Notes:  11:00 – 11:40 AM
♫ On and on and on ♪ [not even sure what song this is]
• Something ‘going down the drain’
Life goes… ♫on and on and on ♪
• Feeling – like ‘just one more time’ – like I really want it badfeels like I’m addicted to itbegging for it.
• Sudden pain shooting up the top front of left leg
‘reviewing’ somethingsome past experience
• having a sudden thought…random memory…
• ‘that’s her!’

‘Trust…just totally trust…then you will FEEL’
New York
‘Who’s Joe?’
• Feels like my mind is searching for something (again!)…then pulls back
• Vision: 2 people…something (smaller) in between them
B G [maybe initials]
Brian [or B-name]…then saw this name with the strike-through as Brian
‘they will come to you’
• ‘this is how it starts’

END…hmmmm. Some interesting notes today. ♥ I’m intrigued with the New York  note . New York has come up a couple of times in the past.  October 1, 2014; October 17, 2014; July 27, 2015 – I wonder if these are connected? And how?

And who is Joe? (July 27th & 28th)

Until tomorrow….

Spiritual Journal July 23, 2015

Thursday…AbOUT TIME

Time is flying by quickly again. I remember reading somewhere we each have the ability to control how quickly or slowly time passes for us. I feel like this has something to do with alchemy, maybe? Anyway,  I want to believe this – that we can control time,  but I’m just not feeling it.  And I am trying.


It seems like just yesterday  I learned of my grand-baby, but tomorrow I get to find out (hopefully!) if it is a boy or girl. Everyone keeps asking me what I think? I tell them I don’t want to guess… and respond with what is most important – ‘healthy’. Besides, I have already been told… “it’s a boy“. But I am not allowing myself to feel it… because something BIG inside of me doesn’t want to feel disappointed if the message or feeling is wrong. Not disappointed if the baby is a girl (no way!) – but disappointed I may somehow be influencing what comes to me. I want to allow myself to feel it. I want to trust.

My life is full. And I feel grateful.

Meditation Notes: 1:17 PM

• Attention to right breast
• N-name
• The teeth (repeated)
• (had to clear throat)
• ‘when you stop wanting to so bad’
• ‘every day’
• Feeling happy – smiling
• Attention to teeth – right side – cheek
Sally [or S-name]
• N-name
• ‘Butera’
• Attention to above left eye
• 19
Dark hair
• Felt as if someone walked up to me
• Heard “sorry it’s been so long”
• Julie / Mary [or J-M name]
• ‘wide open’
• Mild headache – also across bridge of nose – feels like pressure
S-B name
• ‘both’
• Heard “there’s (few or two) things I wanted to say to you”
• hear a very high pitched tone in ears
• Got song lyric ♫ hold me closer tiny dancer ♪ (Elton John)
• Felt tingles run through my legs


Today I potted all of my Spider Plant starts… and I have a bunch! The corkscrew willow branch is cleaned up, debarked to its natural beauty, and ready for fairy lights. Creating ambience. Another pretty word.

Journal Notes July 3, 2015


Yesterday was mulch day…from 10:00 AM until 5:30 PM. ☼ And we’re not done – we just ran out of mulch, after spreading about 10 yards! Another 4 yards to go. The day was actually very meditative for me…focused meditation. I did take about 20 minutes on my bed, after my shower, to ‘tune out’. It was nice. Our friends M&A came over in the evening to visit, and we had a little fire out back and just chatted. So glad to be reconnecting with A. ♥ She also told me about a potential job opportunity, which (amazingly!) sounds appealing to me. Hmmmmm…is my sabbatical over?

Today I feel motivated. I’m thinking about going back to work. I feel a sense of ‘relief’ with the idea of generating an income again…contributing. I only wish I could make this happen by aligning with my true purpose…which is really wherever my passion lies. Right now it is with the ideas of creating things. But I do still believe this will happen for me – when it is time. And maybe the income worry is what is actually blocking my ability to move forward (feeling stuck again)? I need to RELEASE it – and perhaps this is how? Everything happens for a reason.

It is now 11:38 AM and meditation calls me.

Meditation Notes:
Anxious feeling-attention to chest-hard to get a good breath
‘too much thinking’
• (focus on breathing)
asking questions…
END…couldn’t shut off the thoughts today…..but it’s okay ☺

Had a Sister Day ♥…visited K, then S. S and I went closeout shopping. I got a bird feeder and some feed and hung it in the Japanese Maple back by the pond. I sat on the deck to see if the birds would be interested, and after only a minute or two, I saw a huge hawk fly into one of the Corkscrew Willow trees. I captured him on video…and he is beautiful. I think he was a Red Tail Hawk, which interestingly was just a topic of conversation with S., because she had recently seen one and I told her I didn’t think I ever had. Have now!

Hawk Spirit Animal | Meaning

“When you have the hawk as a spirit animal, you may have an inclination towards using the power of vision and intuition in your daily life. The hawk totem provides wisdom about seeing situations from a higher perspective, using the power of observation, and focusing on the task at hand. It’s a good companion to develop spiritual awareness.”

Source: Hawk Spirit Animal | Meaning


Journal Notes May 5, 2015

Angel Numbers 432; 234; 534; 345; 123; … 1-2-3-4-5 ♥ 5-4-3-2-1

8:30 AM : Well, this morning the moon…or it’s energy…is playing “funky’ with me. So many things to do… but I don’t know where to focus my energy. The part of me needing balance (I was born on the Libra/Scorpio cusp) forces me to try to do a little bit of everything. There is just no satisfaction in this, though. No sense of ‘accomplishment’. It feels like I’m WAITINGexpecting something, but I don’t know what. And it feels like I’m supposed to keep busy  – be doing something –  while I wait –  but I don’t know what! And suddenly I feel overwhelmed. Like the energy is invading me and I’m supposed to take Action! Make a Plan! Contribute something!

Before meditation I’ll pray to release the ‘funky’ energy and how it’s making me feel. Is it even mine?☺

  • Meditation Notes:
    • ♫(don’t) blame it on the night, (don’t) blame it on me ♪
    • Feel tense in neck and shoulders
    • ‘Son’
    • ‘security’
    • ‘It will be better this time’
    • Uplifting feelings swept through body – then very quick in my head – like ears popped {TY}
    • Stephanie [or S-name]
    • Children
    • 3
    • ‘intention’
    • Being lifted up/picked up – felt like from under arms
    • Very high pitch tone in ears
    • Like left foot falling into a hole – then ‘stumbling’
    • Attention to left side of neck/throat
    • ‘All 3’ (attention to)
    • ‘feel, hear, see’
    • (Clear throat)
    • ‘Toothpaste’ / ‘yawn’ /’before bed’
    • ……………………………………..
    • ‘Campfire’
    • Something with the arms
    • ‘Throat’
    • ‘Sister’
    • ‘Garbage in/garbage out’
    • ‘Control’ (repeated)
    • “honey”
    • ‘Don’t know words to (some) song’
    • ‘Denying’ (something)
    • ‘Pouting’ – lips
    • do/don’t > ‘do what you do….you don’t’ … ‘even when you can’
    • RIGHT!
    END…As I sat up on the bed…I felt really BIG

YAY! I think I released the energy! I FEEL so much better. Garbage In – Garbage Out.

A little while after I’m done meditating I get a text from the sister…

Sister: Weird energy today.
Me: OMG yes. But I’m telling myself I’m fine.
Sister: …Feel like things are happening I don’t know and I’m waiting. Have no idea what!
Me: OMG you are flipping me out
Sister: I want to yell out to the invisible I feel and say “WHAT?!!” Tell me or stop it!
Me: It’s like you are repeating what I just wrote (in my journal) …I even wrote I wasn’t really sure if these feelings were mine or someone else!
Sister: Soul Sistas
Sister: I feel that they are big feeling. They just feel big.

Well soul sista, I felt the big right after I meditated this morning! And you may want to give another listen to the MAY 2015 ASTROLOGY & NUMEROLOGY FORECAST WITH KARI SAMUELS. ...there’s more to come! Love you!


Journal Notes March 27, 2015

Journal Notes March 27, 2015 Fri

Sleeping well (yay!). I did wake once last night and remember sitting up and looking at the clock on the nightstand. I couldn’t read the numbers again…everything just looked ‘fuzzy’…. repeating the same scenario from about a month ago.

Have noticed my feet are getting that tingly sensation again on the soles – and the two toes on my right foot have the numb sensation. And… I have the super high-pitched tone in my ears again. I notice these strange little physical things randomly – I’m not really sure why (really – I’m not THAT bored? :-p), but because I am aware of them I think they must be worth noting. So, I should also add I am seeing a LOT of shadows passing by me…and NOT just in my peripheral vision. It’s like they are passing right in front of me. I notice the cats behavior when I see the shadows – I can tell they see them, too.

Meditation Notes

  • chest feels tight
  • feel prickly sensations on right foot
  • chest feels like it’s pounding
  • sister
  • Def Leppard song lyric ♫ “won’t you stay with me a while”
  • attention to ‘feet’
  • feels like hand on right foot gently pulling it 
  • feels like hand on right foot gently pushing it
  • hear the “foolin’‘ ♪ lyric [Def Leppard again!]
  • heard (word) “contradictions”


Okay Def Leppard song lyrics…who do you belong to?

FootstepsSo – what’s up with the FEET lately?  In addition to the physical sensations (tingles & numb toes) and my attention being drawn to my feet during meditation, my cat Smokey is attacking them as I walk through the house. At around 6:00 pm this evening I was in the kitchen, at the counter, and it suddenly felt as if something was on my foot. I thought for sure it was one of my cats, but when I looked down and around there were no cats around!




Connections ♥ March 24, 2015

Skeleton Bones

stockvault-human-skeleton-circa-1911148433First – I did a little searching on the symbolism of skeleton bones since I had a vision of this during meditation yesterday. I found a book that provides interesting insight to this vision – via Modern Buddhist Masters: (Living Buddhist Masters) – Jack Kornfield – Google Books.  Actually, I thought of Ezekiel as soon as I had the vision…so this is probably the real connection for me.  I haven’t connected to Ezekiel since last Fall, after first receiving the name on Aug 6, 2014. Ezekiel is the Angel of Transformation…so it seems appropriate to be connecting again ☺.

Those Words: Outside – Yesterday – Last Night (from March 21, 2015 Meditation Notes)

The word outside first came in during meditation on Jan 7, 2015 with “let’s go outside and dig in the dirt”; then on Jan 11 as ‘step outside the body’; and on Jan 25 as ‘need to get outside; on Feb 1 & Feb 2 just the word ‘outside‘; Feb 9 with a ‘feeling of being outside‘ (as in outdoors); and continued on Feb 19, Feb 21, and Feb 23….until March 21. I’m surprised my guides haven’t given up on me yet! But I do believe I understand the message…and I’m trying!!

The word yesterday was first received on Jan 26, 2015 which would make ‘yesterday’ the date Jan 25, 2015 . On this date I noted ‘it is time’, ‘need to get outside’ [smelled, felt and sounded like ‘outside’ (outdoors), too], a ‘message for (me)’ then ‘attention to the throat’ (the message is – use your voice! TALK about it with those ‘outside’). On Jan 26 also I received messages / lessons about staying committed, the word ‘lightworker’, and guidance to share my story (I launched this Blog not long after ) The word yesterday came again on Jan 29, Feb 22, Feb 23, …then March 21.

Now, about last night (from Mar 21 Meditation Notes) – this was the easy one…and this is the one that truly helped me connect the other two ‘words’. Last night would have been Fri March 20th – a significant date in and of itself… but I was with my sister, who I ALWAYS share my meditation experiences with. Not only does she provide great insight, but WE HAVE FUN AND LAUGH!!!  


It is time. Get outside (beyond my safe-haven, or enclosure…which is my home and my laptop!) and share (talk about) your story and experiences with others. Stay committed – but have fun with it!

And So It Is.

Thank You!